The Pedant in the Kitchen - Julian Barnes

I have epic love for Julian Barnes, his writing hits all the right notes with me. He's poetical and dry and witty and really literary and clever yet nothing at all resembling a butthead. Read my earlier review of his amazing book Arthur & George, then go read Arthur & George. This is the first non-fiction book I've reviewed here and indeed read in years (if we don't count boring uni stuff - and let's not). But I was happy to pick this up and put the three other books I was reading down because a) it's Barnes and he's my literary version of Bear Grylls - I'm strangely but completely addicted; b) it was two bucks at Co-op and I would have been happy to pay up to $5 for a Barnes with the crazy warp and bent cover I was awarded as a bonus; and c) it's a book about cooking, and I like cooking.

The title is pretty intriguing too - pedants in kitchens is something I know everyone is familiar with but I wasn't sure how on earth you'd write a book about it. And I was pretty darn pleased with the results of my investigation. Barnes was as sparkly and delightful as usual in his writing and since he turned out to be The Pedant in the Kitchen I was pleased to see some glimpses of his life and forge an understanding of his personality a bit better through his relationship with food and cooking. It's probably a maxi somewhere but I bet you can tell a whole lot about people by looking at their attitude about cooking, in much the same way as you can surmise whether someone is good or evil depending on if they prefer cats or dogs, Wuthering Heights or Jane Eyre, Jacob or Edward.


Barnes is the titular Pedant which means he is a perfectionist in the kitchen and believes in the truth claims made by cookery books and follows recipes down to the last letter, gram and degree. So The Pedant in the Kitchen is really the story of Barnes the writer, reader and amateur cook, reading and reviewing the cook books and recipes that have influenced or inspired him. So we find he loves Jane Grigson, becomes frustrated with Nigel Slater and finds comfort in the old-fashioned charms of Mrs Beeton's Book of Household Management. Other than recipes that just don't work because household kitchens aren't anything like those in restaurants, what Barnes the Pedant is actually fighting against is the vocabulary of cooking. He calls for a more accurate dialect that can actually indicate what a 'pinch', a 'heap' a 'slug' and  a 'handful' actually equate to in terms of chilli, salt or blueberries.


Though I don't agree that a lot of reform is needed - actually I don't think any is needed, I'm the exact opposite of Barnes in the kitchen, being physically, mentally and emotionally unable to follow a recipe exactly - I really liked that Barnes' book about cooking, a non-fiction memoir sort of book about cooking, showed all the same preoccupations as his fiction. The playfulness masking quite an ingrained struggle for truth is here. A sort of metaphysical  game of hide and seek with the value of words. It's cool and I'm not even sure he knew he was doing it in The Pedant in the Kitchen. If he didn't it makes it even cooler. That, and that there's no mention of Nigella Lawson - I don't know if this book was too early to fall under the siren's call of her cooking shows / books / life or if Barnes just never bothered with her. I guess we won't until I read it in his memoir. My favourite part of the whole thing was actually the dedication- 'To She For Whom The Pedant Cooks' which became 'She For Whom' throughout the book where Barnes was The Pedant. That's pretty nice don't you think?

***^/***** (3.5 stars for an easy as pie, light and fluffy read)

Arthur & George - Julian Barnes

In my own mind this particular review has been too long anticipated. Mostly because I've taken way too long to read it - I read every single other book I've blogged about here since starting Arthur & George, (except The Life of Charlotte Bronte which I read while I was waiting for Mum was finish the Barnes book early this year). The other reason is that I've been talking about this book to any and everyone with ears since reading the first sentence. I've been a big fan of Julian Barnes' since I read A History of the World in 10 1/2 Chapters a couple of years ago and fell in love with his writing. Then I found England, England and a book of short stories The Lemon Table, while only a fraction of Barnes' very substantial literary output which fully I intend to read through one day, further solidified my barnacle-like attachment to his way of storytelling.



This book is going to receive my first five-star rating on this blog. Since we try and rate as fairly as possible, some of you may stop reading this review at this point and skip below to the Robert Downey Jr pictures. As long as you understand how great Arthur & George is and use the time saved by exiting at this early point to go out and find/read/love this book I will be satisfied. For those of you either harder to convince or who are so enamoured of my blogging that you hang on Every Word I Type, let's break this claim of extreme excellence down -

Arthur & George is based on the true story of the life of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (I was sold on this book as soon as I realised that HE was the Arthur of the title) and a man called George Edalji. Sir Arthur is plagued by his most successful creation - Sherlock Holmes - and the fame the great detective has brought him.



George is a country solicitor who struggles to gain the respect of his colleagues and to gain an audience for his book about railway law. He's also been receiving some hate mail and the police don't like him very much. The two men's paths cross when George is arrested for a really horrible crime and Arthur decides to play the part of detective for real. It really was a landmark event for the English justice system as George's case, called the 'Great Wryly Outrages', became a catalyst for the establishment of the Court of Criminal Appeal in England. There's a lot more going on than a law case in Arthur & George, though that's what brings the titular characters together and changes both their lives. I loved the illumination of Arthur's growing interest in Spiritualism and George's struggle with his own Christian faith and the many other paralells and divergences of character between them - but I especially love the gentle touch of the writing that reveals without judgment the social experience of two men who were, for very different reasons, seen as different and seperate from those around them.

It's hard to convey without the same gifts for writing, the subtlety and humour of Barnes' language and the way he way he builds his extraordinary story - which feels more like looking through a wormhole in time that Being John Malkovich style puts you inside the character's brains than the result of really good scholarship. I don't want to say any more because Arthur & George is a a mysterious, cloudy jem of a book and I don't want to give any more of it away. I love this book. You should all read it. NOW.

*****/***** (5 of 5!)

Here's another picture of RDJ as Sherlock Holmes and his buddy Watson, played by Jude Law - just because I can. What a fine film it was.